Shit People Say to People with Speech Impairments

Or, at least, these are things people (including some people I love and appreciate very much!) sometimes say to me when I . . .

Answer the phone

  • Oh my goodness! THAT doesn’t sound good!
  • Are you alright?!
  • I can’t understand you AT ALL.
  • Are you on a speakerphone? Can you just pick up?!
  • You sound AWFUL.
  • Do you have a cold?
  • I can’t hear you. Are you on a cell?

Make a Phone Call

YOU’RE BREAKING UP.

YOU’RE BREAKING UP.

CALL. BACK. ON. A. DIFFERENT. PHONE!!!

[Click]

Am at Home

  • [From another room] When are we watching the movie?
  • [From another room] Yes?
  • [From another room] What time is your phone call?
  • [Walking away] WHAT?
  • [Walking away] Where IS the dog?
  • [From several rooms away] WHAT?

Answer the Phone

Oh, did I wake you up?

No, I'm awake.

I’m sorry I woke you.

You didn't wake me. This is just how I sound.

I’ll let you go back to sleep–

No, what do you want?!

Attend a Teleconference

  • I feel really inspired by your presence.
  • It’s so brave of you to attend this. If I was like you, I don’t think I’d come to something like this.
  • You sound awful!
  • Would you rather just be silent?
  • Hey, your voice is really sexy.
  • You couldn’t speak in public though, could you? I mean, how would you talk? Do you use an interpreter or something?
  • Do you mind if I ask what’s wrong with you?

Answer the Phone

  • Ohmigod. Yourvoiceisn’tworkingrightnow?!?! OkayI’llcallbackanothertime. [click]
  • Your voice isn’t working? Wasn’t that better before? Why is it back now?
  • Do I need to get the machine? The, uh, DDT?
  • Oh honey, you sound TERRIBLE.
  • I like talking to you better when your voice is working.

Make a Phone Call

[Nervously] HELLO?

[Scared] WHO IS THIS?!

[Terrified] HOW DID YOU GET THIS NUMBER?!

[click]

Am at Home

Yup!

Yes, I understand you! I’ve already done it!

[An hour later]

You want me to make you a protein drink?

No, there isn’t one made. But I can make one now.

An hour ago? Oh! I thought you were asking if I’d let the dog out!

Attend a Teleconference

Hi. This is Mary. Who else is here?

This is Sheila.

Hi Sheila.

Hi Mary.

So I guess we’re the only two in here?

I thought there were supposed to be three people per break-out group?

Well, I guess it’s just the two of us! Let’s get started!

Answer the Phone

Hello?

Hello, is someone there?

Oh! Is . . . uh? . . . Betsy? . . . There??

I’ll just send her an email. [click]

Make a Phone Call

  • You sound AWFUL!
  • Can you speak UP?
  • Uh-oh, this sounds like a bad voice day. We can talk another time.
  • You’re having problems with your voice again? But you sounded fine last time I talked to you.
  • I CAN’T UNDERSTAND YOU!
  • Hello? Is anyone there? [click]
  • I can’t hear you! You’re holding the phone too far from your mouth!

Attend a Teleconference

I’m just so inspired by your courage.

Well, to attend something like this, I just don’t know if I’d have the courage….

I just find you really inspiring.

Answer the Phone

Hello? Hello?

Do I have the wrong number? I’m trying to reach Betsy?

Is this the number for BETSY?

IthinkIhavethewrongnumber [click]

Make a Phone Call via the Relay

[click]

[click]

[click]

[click]

Answer the Phone

Hello is Betsy there?

You can take a message?

Do. You. Have. PAPER?

And. A. PEN?

This. is. Jane. Doe. D-O-E. My. NUMBER. is. 4.1.3… 1.2.3… 4.5.6.7…

Can you read that back to me?

[click]

If you want to watch a slew of “Shit People Say” videos relating to disability, here are a bunch on youtube. My favorites are Shit People Say to Non-Verbal People, Shit Healthy People Say to Sick People, Shit People Say to the Disabled, Shit People Say to Service Dog Handlers, Shit People Say to People with Disabilities, and Sh*t People Say to People with Psychological Disabilities.

P.S. I decided not to cover ground I’ve already posted on about my speech impairment.

Comments

Shit People Say to People with Speech Impairments — 1 Comment

  1. this is one of those things that’s really, really difficult for me. i have a hard time translating spoken words into words in my head that i can comprehend, and phone calls, most accents and sometimes speech impairments are even more difficult to translate for me. one of the things i struggle with is explaining this to people politely in settings where i can’t necessarily explain why (like at work when helping customers). i usually default to “i’m sorry, i’m having a really hard time understanding.” do you think this is an appropriate way of wording it? is there a way i can be more polite about the issue? i know it sucks to not be understood and people being rude about it when it happens to me.

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